Fight Fatigue and Up Your Energy -- But Not By Finding Balance
If you’re tired of feeling tired all the time (both physically and mentally), as well as particularly stressed out with no energy level to speak of, I may just have the answer for you. Or rather, Linda Hawes Clever, M.D., author of the new book The Fatigue Prescription: Four Steps to Renewing Your Energy, Healthy, and Life may just have the answer for you. (And guess what? The answer is not balance!) This book is no pretentious meditation on the concept of fatigue: It’s a practical, no-nonsense guide filled with concrete tips on how to make your life better. And what could be better than that? (Besides feeling less fatigued, of course, and Dr. Clever also helps us with that dilemma.) The Fatigue Prescription is an interactive workbook both because of the way it’s laid out, and because I’m in the process of making it work for me. You should, too. But in the meantime, check out my Q&A with Dr. Clever about some of the finer points in her book:
Something you say on page 61 of “The Fatigue Prescription” literally stopped me in my tracks: “If your goal is to overcome fatigue, balance is not your ticket.” Whoa. This contradicts everything I’ve ever thought, read, or been taught about balance, which is that it’s something for which we should all strive. (But your take sounds oddly liberating.) So why shouldn’t balance shouldn’t be our ultimate life goal?
It’s not that I’m opposed to balance. It’s useful for easier living, yet it isn’t enough for whole and healthy living. I believe that balance is too difficult, too temporary, and often is someone else’s definition. Just watch a baby learning how to walk or an elderly person re-learning how to walk after a stroke. It’s hard. Whether walking, bicycling, or juggling many activities and priorities, finding balance is fleeting at best. It seems as if we snag a bit of time from one place—work—and slap it onto another place—say, a teacher’s meeting. That’s a very temporary solution and not at all satisfying. Also, who’s to say what the right “balance” is? Your neighbor? A friend (with household help and a nanny)? Your classmate? Balance isn’t a concept to get hung up on or to have as your ultimate goal. When you know your values, on the other hand, you can choose to live them, to set priorities based on them, to allot time according to them. This is good, solid ground — not shadowy, evanescent “balance.”
What roles do fear, anger, and not being able to let go of the past play in our overall level of fatigue?
Fear can be useful. It can get you out of trouble in a hurry, for example. Chronic fear, however, is paralyzing. Your body just isn’t meant to be fearful all of the time. Your body pressure, appetite, and even your muscles suffer (the latter because they may be tensed too much). Plus, you can’t always think clearly. This can lead to costly mistakes and impaired judgment, and those are exhausting. Being aware that you’re angry also can be helpful. Then you can re-use or re-direct the anger toward developing a constructive solution. Chronic anger or recurring anger can affect your body and blur judgment, just as fear can, as many have discovered. That’s tiring. Being able to “let go” is necessary for you to refill your energy bucket, clear your vision, regain your creativity, and move ahead. Not letting go means that you’re tired, unable to see and do new things with vitality, and immobilized. That can only bring you down.
Do people really need to have hobbies in order to be happy and healthy?
Not to duck the question, but it depends on how you define “hobby.” Many people consider a hobby something to do with your hands, as in a craft (quilting, painting) or collection (stamps, electric trains). I would be much more generous with the definition. A hobby is something that you find fun, engrossing, or expanding: Reading, biking, taking a course in Portuguese or Eritrean cuisine, or visiting all of the national parks. Part of your work could even be a hobby—learning a new program or specialty or becoming the company archivist. The point is, if you stop learning, you die. Also, all work and no play make you dull, sad, and, often, stuck. Whatever you call it, broaden your horizons and increase your zest with “hobbies.”
Can or should a person ever try to change their partner’s “bad” habits (slumped posture, bad breath, fear of going to the doctor, etc.) whether or not the partner is resistant to such change?
I can’t imagine anything more fruitless than trying to change a partner—unless the partner wants to change. (And the change would be for the partner’s sake, not yours.) Now, if you want to suffer, get at least two people irritated and grumpy, and enhance any existing passive-aggressiveness, then go for it. You might try, of course, to scatter some educational material around the house; enlist the help of friends, relatives, and a physician or dentist (I’m referring to the bad breath); and otherwise try to tip the scales. But the fact is, the only things you can control are your own behavior, your own attitude, and your own aspirations. On a good day. And on a very good day, you may influence your partner to change a behavior. A very, very good day.
Linda Hawes Clever, M.D., MACP, founder and president of the not-for-profit RENEW and Associate Dean for Alumni Affairs at Stanford University Medical School, is the author of the new book The Fatigue Prescription: Four Steps to Renewing Your Energy, Health, and Life. She received undergraduate and medical degrees from Stanford University. After interning at Stanford, she had several years of medical residency and fellowships at Stanford and the University of California, San Francisco. Dr. Clever is Board certified in Internal Medicine and Occupational Medicine.
Dr. Clever’s personal and professional interests center on health, “renewal” (the ever-necessary process of refreshing values, goals, and energy), leadership, building community, and the interactions of lives, health, and work.
Dr. Clever has been a pioneer in the care of immigrants and other low-income patients, training of nurse practitioners, humane treatment of AIDS patients in the workplace, and occupational health. She has led national, regional, and local medical and voluntary organizations and has written scores of papers, chapters, and editorials for medical journals, books, and newspapers.
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